Too often people's gifts and skills are being ignored when professionals plan with them, there is no excuse, this must change now says Sam Sly.
Author: Sam Sly
A version of this article was first published in Learning Disability Today.
A beautiful, vibrant, loving, caring young woman is celebrating her 30th birthday soon. To give you an example of her thoughtfulness, on Christmas Day morning this young woman took time out to phone me and wish me a Merry Christmas and to tell me I’d been missed as I had been away from work for a few months. She is a true gem.
She has said I can share her party plans with you all. She has been making them for months and sent invites out in September because she is so excited about it, and has never celebrated a ‘big’ birthday before in her own home. She’s done detailed planning and some sharp negotiations around the costs to ensure it is affordable. This woman knows how to strike a deal!
Fourteen people have been invited – family, friends and some people that help her day to day. They are starting off at her house with hair and make-up, a few drinks, music, laughter and some girly fun. Then a limo is taking everyone to a slap up Chinese meal in town followed by karaoke and a VIP area at a local club to end the evening with some dancing. What a night! What a way to celebrate and I am glad I will be there with her to see her smile.
The thing is, she is worth it, she has been through some very tough times, she is brave and resilient and at long last she is living a life - still with all its ups and downs - that makes her happy the majority of the time, as life does for most of us. That’s real life!
This young woman has some major health problems, she hates them, but she puts up with having to spend lots of her precious time in a general Hospital and at medical appointments. She has epilepsy you see, and coupled with a learning disability and an unjust label of challenging behaviour this young woman had to spend her 16th, 18th, and 21st birthdays in Institutions, including Specialist Hospitals away from home.
Just before Christmas I was off work after an operation and found myself spending more time on Twitter. I came across a story with similarities to our party girl but a very different ending. Although ‘story’ does not give justice to the travesty that happened to this very young man lovingly nicknamed LB (Laughing Boy) by his family, and whose Mum writes witty blogs about, where their obvious love for him shines through every word.
LB also had epilepsy, a learning disability and was given a label of challenging behaviour. He was sent to a Specialist Hospital away from home where he died in July 2013 at about the time our young woman started planning her birthday.
His family, obviously devastated became more so when it emerged a few months later that the Hospital he was staying in did not, when inspected by the Care Quality Commission, meet any of the Essential Standards of Quality and Safety required.
Of the investigation, responsibility, culpability etc. I do not, nor profess to have, any knowledge. But what affects me most, and makes me saddest is that both our Party Girl and LB were turned by professionals, whose job supposedly involves caring for and about people, into medical and behavioural non-humans. When, in fact they were being described by those who loved and cared about them as:
"hilarious, remarkable, generous, loving, talented and exceptional dude who loves Eddie Stobart, drum and base and going to London" (LB)
and:
"loving, funny, witty, caring, sociable, gentle, beautiful, and resilient" (Party Girl)
Their gifts and skills were ignored and from that point bad things happened.
It doesn’t have to be this way. When we at Beyond Limits first meet someone we are planning with to move out of a Specialist Hospital we have what we call a Service Design day. It is a positive day, all about the person and their hopes, dreams, skills, gifts and talents and the person invites those people that love, care and want the best for them along. These days are incredibly powerful and they enable us to design a service for someone that has foundations firmly cemented in the good things, and in the positives, not the deficits.
I categorically believe that this is the only way to plan and get things right for someone. It is only on these foundations that any lasting service can be developed for people who have been so systematically de-valued and de-personalised by what we have done to them in our horrid systems.
This column is dedicated to our Party Girl - hope you have an amazing birthday - and to LB and his family, and their fight for justice. Good luck and the World are behind you.
The publisher is The Centre for Welfare Reform.
The Harm Professionals Can Do © Sam Sly 2014.
All Rights Reserved. No part of this paper may be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher except for the quotation of brief passages in reviews.
disability, intellectual disabilities, social care, Article